this time last year i was drowning in a new job, miserable in the relationship i was in, and searching for a way to get out of my parents' house. this year i am content with my job and love what i do most days. i am happy in the relationship i am in and can't imagine my life without her. i am actually get ready to move into a new house with my girlfriend. i am probably the happiest i have been in years.
it's funny how things change when you except yourself for who you are. when you look beyond your own faults and know that you are who are you. you choose to love yourself regardless of how the world tells you that you should feel about yourself. i actually love myself. do i still have bad days where i want to stay in bed or i feel like if i eat a single bite of food, i'm going to throw up. but i still make it every day. i get out of bed even when it's a struggle. i am proud of myself.
sometimes i don't think that society as a whole understands what it's like to struggle with depression and an eating disorder. i don't think that they realize that it's a daily process to make yourself get out of bed. to take care of yourself when all you want to do is die. to make yourself eat because you know if you don't, you'll spiral back into a hole where you have to take medicine just to make you want to live.
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